


The Jar Stories

by AmieWritesFic



Series: The Lost Fics of Amie Luna [4]
Category: Glee
Genre: Dirty Jokes, Fluff, Multi, One Word Prompts, Random & Short, Short One Shot, adorableness, text fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-04
Updated: 2017-01-10
Packaged: 2018-09-14 18:59:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 1,694
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9198629
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AmieWritesFic/pseuds/AmieWritesFic
Summary: So i asked people to give me random words, i wrote them on pieces of paper and put them in a jar. So I will pull out a paper and write a drabble/one-shot based off that word. Various pairings, all unrelated to the others.





	1. Dodge

**Author's Note:**

> I am aiming for one story per day for the whole year. If i miss a day, i'll do 2 stories the next day. miss 2 days, 3 stories the following day. and so on.  
> Some chapters may be very short. It's mainly a way for me to get my brain flowin'  
> I am still taking one-word promts so feel free to comment with a list of random words

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: G  
> Pairing: none  
> Warnings: implied violence

This was the worst day in gym class for Rory. He had barely gotten over Santana pelting him in the face during the Battle of the Show Choirs. Although, now he understands the American game of Dodgeball. He knew people who played Rugby back in Ireland, he can be just as tough as them.

That was how he felt until he saw Azimio and Craig from the football team were some of his opponents. As he limped off to the nurse's office, bleeding, he decided to just stick to being an observer of sports.


	2. Car

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: G  
> Pairing: none (implied Quinn/Finn and Quinn/Puck)  
> Warning: none

Quinn sat in the driver's seat. 'I could do this', she thought. The instructor got into the passenger seat, clipboard in hand. 

"Walk me through the process of getting ready to drive somewhere, Miss Fabray." He said

"Uhm, first seat belt. Then I check my mirrors, start the ignition, check my blind spot. Then foot on the break while i put the car in drive."

"Correct. No i want you to take us down Main st and take a left on to South St."

Quinn steadily drove along, following the directions the instructor gave her. He then made her parallel park in front of the testing center. She did her best and shut the car off.

"Congratulations Miss Fabray, you are now a licensed driver."

She practically ran into the DMV to get her photo taken and to finish the paperwork to get her new ID. It would still be a little while before she could afford a car, but she was just so happy to have the chance to drive it when she did. 

She knew exactly how to celebrate too. Puck had invited her over to watch a movie. She knew it may not have been the best idea since she was still dating Finn and had a reputation to keep as the President of the Chastity Club, but what was the worst that could happen by just hanging out with a friend?


	3. Cheat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: T  
> Pairing: Kurt/Blaine, Mentioned Blaine/Eli, Implied Kurt/Sebastian  
> Warnings: infidelity, surprise kiss

Sebastian looked across the quad. He was on a week-long campus visit at NYU and so far felt very impressed. He thought his top choice would always be Boston University, but he had grown to love New York's vibe. What he liked the most was that NYU had a joint admissions program with some of the performing arts schools around so that those students could get core education requirements in as well. Performing arts schools like NYADA, where his old nemesis Kurt went. It wasn't necessarily that he liked seeing Kurt, but he did find much joy in seeing Kurt squirm. It was few and far between when they crossed paths, but when it happened, it filled Sebastian with such delight. He was long over trying to get with Blaine, ever since it became more fun to just tease Kurt. 

Sebastian was about to forcibly put himself in Kurt's path for the fourth time that week when his phone buzzed.

_Look, cuz! I got a dime piece! -Eli_

His cousin, Eli, was also gay. They often bragged to each other about their conquests. This text came with a few pictures attached. The first was of a naked sleeping boy, face down. Sebastian had to admit that he had a perfect ass. The next two photos stopped Sebastian short. It was of the sleeping boy's face. It was Blaine. Did he and Kurt break up? With a quick facebook stalk he saw that they were still together.

"Excuse me, Smythe. I get that you are using your college visit to make my life a living hell, but i really need to get to class!" Kurt's voice broke Sebastian's trance. He wasnt sure how to formulate a response, so he just thrust the phone in Kurt's face.

Kurt looked at the screen annoyed, then confused, then angry, then hurt. "What the fuck is this?"

"My cousin...i think he hooked up with your boyfriend...." Sebastian suddenly felt bad for Kurt. He wasnt sure why, he just did. Kurt pulled his own phone out and took a snap of Sebastian's screen, furiously typing a message along with it.

"I gave him everything and i'm gone a few weeks and he does this to me? With some stranger! At least if it was you, i would have seen it coming but some random guy. I can't believe it. Blaine better have a fucking twin i never knew about."

Kurt kept rambling and typing on his phone when Sebastian had an idea. He grabbed Kurt's phone, deleted the novel the guy was going to send, and turned the camera on. "Smile Hummel."

Before Kurt could react, Sebastian pulled him in and planted a kiss right on the mouth. The phone camera flashed and Sebastian pulled away. Kurt was in such a haze that he didnt even notice his phone back in his hand and Sebastian leaving. He looked down and saw that Sebastian had texted Blaine for him.

_Two can play at that game, Anderson ;) Tell Eli, his cuz says hello and that if you are a dime, that i'm a 100$ bill! We're done. -Kurt_

Kurt stared at the photo of him and Sebastian kissing for a minute before another text came through. He expected it to be a half-assed apology from Blaine, but it was instead an unknown number.

_It's your friendly neighborhood Meerkat here. let me know when you wanna do that again off camera! -Bas_

Well, there was no way Kurt was going to class now.


	4. Money

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: G  
> Pairing: none  
> Warnings: gambling, Sam being the greatest human

"....and the final number is....14! Congratulations to whomever won our 14 million dollar Jackpot! I'm Walter Stevensen, good night."

They were all crowded around the TV with their lotto tickets in hand. Kurt and Rachel were moody because they lost on the first number. Santana and Mercedes weren't playing but helping Artie look through his pile of tickets only to find that he also lost.

Sam sat quietly for a moment, staring at his ticket. "I won."

"What was that Lips McGee?" Santana asked.

"I won.....I won the Jackpot...I won 14 million dollars." 

They all crowded around Sam, reviewing his ticket. He had indeed won and they all cheered.

"No one deserves it more than you, buddy." Artie smiled.

"Well i can think of two people." Sam whispered. He took out his phone and dialed home, "Mom, Dad....I have something to give you...."


	5. Water

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: G  
> Pairing: Blaine/Unnamed partner  
> Warning: adorableness

"no no no no no no NO!" Blaine yelled from the other room.

Pamela looked up from her magazine to where her son was rushing around the kitchen. "Everything ok, sweetie?"

"I dropped my phone in the sink!" He sounded on the brink of tears.

"Why were you using it over the sink?"

"I made a snowman out of dishsoap and I wanted to snapchat it..."

Pamela walked over to her boy. "Honey, you're 35 years old. Now please finish with these dishes, put your phone in some dry rice, and come help your husband and son decorate the tree."


	6. Blushing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: M  
> Pairing: Kurt/Sebastian (sorta)  
> Warnings: dirty jokes, text fic
> 
> (Pro tip: never google "dirty jokes" without safe search on....i'm scarred for life!)

Monday

To Kurt: Hey Hummel. Why is Santa's sack so big?

From Kurt: Sebastian, I'm trying to read.

To Kurt: just answer

To Kurt: please!

From Kurt: fine. Why is Santa's sack so big

To Kurt: Cause he only comes once a year!

From Kurt: very funny. can i go back to reading now?

To Kurt: Fine..... :p

 

Tuesday

To Kurt: What did the banana say to the vibrator?

From Kurt: really, Bas? I'm at work!

To Kurt: .....

From Kurt: geez! what

To Kurt: why are you shaking? He's gonna eat me!

To Kurt: oh come on. that was a good one and you know it

From Kurt: bye Sebastian

 

Wednesday

From Kurt: do you think Italian or Thai for Rachel's birthday dinner?

To Kurt: Mexican. I'm craving some spicy peppers

To Kurt: Hey what do you call two jalapenos getting it on?

From Kurt: fucking hot

To Kurt: did i already do that one?

From Kurt: i can read your mind, Bas. See you tonight.

 

Thursday

To Kurt: did i leave my wallet at your place? I don't have it in my jacket like usual

From Kurt: yep. I hope your visa has a good limit ;)

To Kurt: Whats the difference between a pick pocket and a peeping tom?

From Kurt: one snatches your watch and the other watches your snatch

From Kurt: i know what youre doing. 

From Kurt: youre gonna have to try harder than that

To Kurt: oh Princess, if theres one thing i excel at, its things that are hard!

 

Friday

From Kurt: What's the difference between hungry and horny?

Sebastian looked down at his phone. "Are you texting me from the other room?" he yelled towards Kurt's room from his seat on the couch.

From Kurt: sorry cant hear you. use your phone

From Kurt: What's the difference between hungry and horny?

To Kurt: youre weird. Whats the difference?

From Kurt: where you put the cucumber

From Kurt: [Photo sent]

Sebastian's eyes went wide and his face went bright red

To Kurt: on my way!

To Kurt: also thanks for the boner ever time i eat salad


	7. Moonlight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rating: G  
> Pairing: none  
> Warnings: pre-canon fluffiness

Kurt sat on the front step, his head leaning onto his mother's arm. He wasn't big enough to reach her shoulder. He loved the period of summer when it was still warm at night and his parents let him stay up late. 

"I love these nights with you, Mommy." He said in a sweet little voice.

"I love them too, darling. I remember staying up late and looking at the moon and stars with your grandpa, picking our favorite stars." Elizabeth said, pressing a kiss to the top of her son's head.

"What's your favorite?"

Elizabeth looked across the sky and found the North Star, "That one. It's the brightest and most important part of the whole universe. Just like you, my darling."

"Well if that's me, you must be the Moon, mommy!"

"Why is that?" 

"Cause it's even shinier and beautifuler than anything else in the whole everything."

"I love you, my sweet boy."

"I love you too, mommy. Can we stay out here forever?"

"I wish we could dear," Elizabeth said, holding Kurt close, "I wish we could."

**Author's Note:**

> dont forget to comment with one-word prompts.


End file.
